Baby lingo

Have you ever noticed that we use certain lingo when talking about babies that we’d never use in reference to adults? Here are some examples of how it might sound if we did:

1)      I know a guy I could set you up with. He’s got the cutest chubby thighs, an adorable round belly and a double chin to die for.

2)      Why don’t you toddle over to Subway and grab me a turkey sandwich?

3)      Hey, nice burp, Larry. That was a good one.

4)      I apologize for my husband’s behavior – he’s a little bit fussy today.

5)      You have insomnia? Have you considered swaddling yourself with your arms in?

6)      Wow Betty, look at how you hold up your own head. Nice going.

7)      You might be depressed, but it’s also possible you are just colicky.

8)      Hey, honey, how was work? And what color and consistency was your poop today?

9)      You seem cranky, Martha. Perhaps this is because you are tired or just a little bit gassy? Or perhaps you are teething?

10)   At my last doctor’s appointment, he measured me 6 feet long and said my head circumference was in the seventy fifth percentile.

11)   You want to grab some coffee and catch up – maybe chat, coo and babble about old times?

12)   You’ve got something on your chin. Oh, it’s okay, it’s just spit up. Can I get you a burp cloth?

13)   I thought I’d take mother out for her birthday, maybe sign us up for a Mommy and Me yoga class.

14)   I use Head & Shoulders because I have cradle cap.

15)   Those socks are so cute, Evelyn. I love how they’re designed to look like shoes.

16)   The agenda for today? Two meetings in the morning, a nap, a feeding and some tummy time in the afternoon.

I might just adopt some of these phrases. I particularly love the idea of referring to people as “fussy.” Can you think of any other baby talk that would sound silly in reference to adults?


Filed under Baby talk, Parenting

8 responses to “Baby lingo

  1. Funny list. I like the first one in particular.
    Everyone always wants to tickle kids to make them laugh. I’m sure you could come up with some baby talk about that.

  2. This totally made me laugh out loud!

  3. This is awesome! I would also add, “Oh, so you’re having a hard time settling down? Want me to drive you around the block a few times to get you to fall asleep?”

  4. ha ha! I SO want a pair of a adult socks that are made to look like shoes… 🙂

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